The euhporia is easing back into reality nicely - slowly. The show was really good, and for me good in a number of ways i could not have anticipated. I did much more promo work than i have for shows of mine in the past, and it paid off. I was of course deathly scared that i would book the club for a Saturday night prime time slot and let Bob Holman down with a poor turnout. Then i was of course deathly scared that i'd get loads of folks there and then fall flat on my face; so by the time show time came, i was of course a nervous wreck; especially since the night before's drink antics left me with very little voice.
One of the perennial phobias i have going to the stage is that i'm sure i'm always unprepared; or that i haven't prepared enough. Maybe it's because i know i'm usually procrastinating or that i've spent much of my life underachieving, but i'm always sure i could have done more work and that the universe will punish me for taking it, for taking my work for granted.
But there are so many different things on a night that can swing the balance of one's confidence. Fish and Eliel calling me to wish me luck and give me words of encouragement even though they couldn't make it, getting to the club and finding it pretty full long before 8 o'clock. Seeing folks at the club from several different parts of my life (art crowd and non-art crowd), having Anthony in the audience seeing me perform for the first time and performing stuff about home no less, and havng an opening act that absolutely makes you want to take the stage; that so completely makes the energy in the space sanctified that you can't help but have a good time on the stage and do a good job. In general i felt so supported, by everyone who was there and everyone who helped me with the show, by Marty who was on a completely other coast but broke into my e-mail and retrieved my poems and made me a chapbook on Word and e-mailed it back to me, by Lynne who became my de facto stage manager at the last minute, by Patrice and Rebecca who came from DC to see the show (happy birthday Patrice), by Cherrie and Fish who both sent the e-mails to their personal list serves and brought mad folks along. There were Cave Canem folk there and LouderARTS folk there and it all felt really good to be able to perform for their enjoyment.
So now; what to do with the show. It needs some work. It needs to be looked at for its overall theatrical possibilities. I need to memorize the entire script and maybe look at the possibility for transitions. I need to figure out where i can take it and perform it as a show and i need to book it for sometime again soon at Bowery. So again, thank you thank you thank you thank you to everyone who made it and everyone else who couldn't and gave me mad love, and even silent prayers.
Meanwhile, i have a second interview for this job tomorrow and i have to come up with a workshop on communication that i will present for this interview and i feel like i absolutely do not have the energy right now. I think i'll go get a beer and then sit down with this thing and see what happens.
I'll let you all know what happens after it. Need to get back to some writing right now.
One of the perennial phobias i have going to the stage is that i'm sure i'm always unprepared; or that i haven't prepared enough. Maybe it's because i know i'm usually procrastinating or that i've spent much of my life underachieving, but i'm always sure i could have done more work and that the universe will punish me for taking it, for taking my work for granted.
But there are so many different things on a night that can swing the balance of one's confidence. Fish and Eliel calling me to wish me luck and give me words of encouragement even though they couldn't make it, getting to the club and finding it pretty full long before 8 o'clock. Seeing folks at the club from several different parts of my life (art crowd and non-art crowd), having Anthony in the audience seeing me perform for the first time and performing stuff about home no less, and havng an opening act that absolutely makes you want to take the stage; that so completely makes the energy in the space sanctified that you can't help but have a good time on the stage and do a good job. In general i felt so supported, by everyone who was there and everyone who helped me with the show, by Marty who was on a completely other coast but broke into my e-mail and retrieved my poems and made me a chapbook on Word and e-mailed it back to me, by Lynne who became my de facto stage manager at the last minute, by Patrice and Rebecca who came from DC to see the show (happy birthday Patrice), by Cherrie and Fish who both sent the e-mails to their personal list serves and brought mad folks along. There were Cave Canem folk there and LouderARTS folk there and it all felt really good to be able to perform for their enjoyment.
So now; what to do with the show. It needs some work. It needs to be looked at for its overall theatrical possibilities. I need to memorize the entire script and maybe look at the possibility for transitions. I need to figure out where i can take it and perform it as a show and i need to book it for sometime again soon at Bowery. So again, thank you thank you thank you thank you to everyone who made it and everyone else who couldn't and gave me mad love, and even silent prayers.
Meanwhile, i have a second interview for this job tomorrow and i have to come up with a workshop on communication that i will present for this interview and i feel like i absolutely do not have the energy right now. I think i'll go get a beer and then sit down with this thing and see what happens.
I'll let you all know what happens after it. Need to get back to some writing right now.
1 Comments:
Silent Prayers. I often question what are these?
Recently, one of my playgroup friends had a sick daughter. I told him, “Tell Maighread I will send her a bottle of energy. It will be the Healing Room of her Dreaming Place.
Tell her to go there at nap time and get it. It will be the purple one. Because that is her favorite color. But, the energy will be green,because that is better for healing.”
I guess I sent you some yellow, Roger. Maybe I made a mistake. Yellow is good for the mind. But, purple would have been better - for that is of the spirit. And the spirit of your performance is always dynamic.
Of course they are complimentary colors and ideas. So, I’ve sent a another bottle. This time it is purple. I hope the room in your Dreaming Place is not cluttered with dusty bottles waiting to be opened. For I often send them out to you. Perhaps, though it doesn’t matter
whether they are open or closed. After all, Maighread needed antibiotics to get well. But, then she is three.
It is hard to find the Growing Room in your Dreaming Place. Harder maybe for adults.
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